YOU HAVE DONE SUCH A WONDERFUL JOB ON YOUR PRECIOUS BROTHER'S SITE. I LOVE ALL THE PICTURES. HE IS SO VERY HANDSOME. HE WAS VERY SPECIAL TO YOU, I CAN TELL!! I KNOW WHAT IT'S LIKE TO LOSE A BROTHER. MY OLDER BROTHER DIED ABOUT 8 YEARS AGO, FROM CANCER. THEN NOW OUR PRECIOUS DAVID. I DO KNOW, WITHOUT A DOUBT, THAT WE WILL SEE THEM AGAIN ONE DAY. SO, HANG IN THERE, OKAY?
LOVE AND HUGS,
CATHY GIRAUD (MOM OF DAVID)
In Loving Memory of Christopher / Carol Pizzi (Angel Debbie's Mom )
DEAR CHRIS REMEMBERING YOU.... / IRENE MOMMY TO ANGEL KAYLA XAVIER ..4EVER (JAN. 30, 2009 )
Dear Chris...missing and remembering you on this sad day with love ..you are such a beautiful angel...may the gentle sun light always shines on you...many hugs and kisses sending your way ...love always..irene, mommy to angel..Kayla Xavier..forever.
I will be participating again this year in the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention Charity Walk on November 1, 2008. I thought you family would like to participate. Here is the information.
What would I do if I could comfort you? Maybe say a few words to try and help you get through. With my arm around you, I would hold your hand- And assure you someday we will be together again. I would tell you each little thing- that everyday reminds me of you. And I would tell you all the things I miss- That we will once again do. I would tell you talk about me to those that we love. And remind them I can see everything from not too far up above. I would say to you and every other person that I love Do not grieve for the loss of my life By living with my memories you help keep my spirit alive! I know you just can’t help it, and sometimes you’ll be sad. But stop and just be THANKFUL for the great times that we had! Make funny jokes and tell outrageous stories- of course at my expense. Because you know me- I’m laughing right along- I’d never take offence! I know it feels like a million years since our last long warm embrace. Just know you will once again hear my sweet voice- And I can’t WAIT to kiss your face. My wish for you is happiness, so do not cry for me. On the other side- patiently waiting- that is where I’ll be! So when you need to feel me close, just know I’m right here beside you. I’ll always be your listening ear, and try to help you guide through. And last- know this as much as anything- Never be afraid- To Celebrate My Life and the memories we made!
(I wrote this poem on the 2 year anniversary of Chris' passing, but didn't realize it until I found his page in August. I hope it brings many of you comfort. Please don't use it without my permission...it is copyrighted. Feel free to contact me about it though.)
Happy birthday / Carol Hensley (dear friend ) Chris, I miss you every day. Trinity was over with Kate and Gwen and she is so beautiful and we talked about you. She told me you were in heaven and I told her I knew you were. Tatum and Angela have done such a good job with her keeping your memory alive in a way that she and the girls are ok and feel comfortable talking freely about you. Your sister is very precious to me, as you were. and I hope you can send her prayers today . She misses you so much and loves you. It breaks my heart to see that sweet girl in so much pain. Today you are being thought about in many homes by many friends and family members who love you and are still coping with this tragedy. Love "Mom"
For you Chris and your family / Angela Wrate Nickys Mum (angel /care friend ) Chris you have a very special sister her name is Angela. I just want you to know that she has helped me with some Graphics for my son who was born in the same year as you, and left this life also at the age of 29 forever. I and my family know how hard it is to live each day without your loved one's here on earth. However i do believe that your spirit is still with your family. This was the first time i visited your site You will always be remembered. Death is not the end. Hugs to Heaven and if you see my Nicky tell him we also miss him just like your family misses and loves you. xxxxxxxxAngela Nickys mum xxx
What is important??? / Angela (sister) So many things have changed since you left...
I can think of very bad things. I lost a lot when I lost you...my best friend, my brother, and just a general good person. So much bad happened it is sometimes hard to see through to the good, but I know it is there. So many good things going for me now. I have tons of volunteer work going on and am returning to school. I wish you were here to do the same. I know this will never be a reality but I can still wish. I have so many burned bridges that can never be crossed again. I was thinking about that the other day...You use to always accuse me of starting fires lol...Did you ever think that it never hurts to stir things up a bit. Sometimes the bridges you have crossed are not worth looking back over. Sometimes the places they lead are not places you should have been at to begin with. I think about those words and I have seriously weighed them, my conclusion is this....
Of all the places I have been and I am going the only bridge I would try and rebuild would be yours...But that I can never do. I have my children they are healthy and smart, and I know you will watch over us.
That is enough for me. That is enough for me Chris. I will always miss you so much that I can hardly breathe. I will always cry with Mom and Dad over your loss, but I know you are here watching.
I am sure you can see "the whole map" now and realize some bridges need to be burned and forgotten. I am sure you can see all the bridges that you crossed, a few too many times, along the way. As a matter of fact, I believe if we do not burn bridges, just keep them open for later crossing, that we will most definitely never move forward. Actually we will almost always stay on the same path stuck in a rut of repeating history and more likely bad mistakes...
There are few people I have missed like I miss you. Of course Grandma and some of the others are hurtful to think about but not as breath taxingly horrid as the loss of you.
I knew that we are never promised tomorrow and that something's can't be taken back...well at least I thought I did.
I have been called many names and accused of many things. I believe some of them are right and of course some of them are wrong. At this point none of those matter to me anymore. What matters is trying to remember all the good things, like your smile, river trips, and things that are actually important.
I can no longer go over every inch of our past. I just can't retrace every step it is impossible! All I can do is remember that some bridges were never worth crossing to begin with and that is why they no longer exist. I can remember that in order to get to certain people that I think I love there are fires in the way that will most definitely never go out, and it is not worth being burned and hurt all over again...But yours is a bridge I can never rebuild not all the time and love in the world can fix this. I sure do miss you Chris...
I promise I have learned from all this. I do not use it as a reason to drink myself sober trying to forget. I do not use it as an excuse for anything. I use this as a lesson in life I never wanted to learn but had to.
It is a pity it took all this for me to realize what and whom matters in life. I will never forget you or this most valued lesson.
Hello Handsome Angel and dear friend Angela / Rosemary Sis Of ^j^ Alvin Cremeans I am sorry it's been a while since I stopped in to visit the two of you. But to be honest the last time I was here I spent more than half of the day reading about Chris. I listened to the songs and watched the heartwrenching videos at least twice. Angela my heart hurts so much for Chris like it does for my brother. And for you and your family too. I believe our brothers are probely hanging out somewhere up there in Heaven and I am sure mine is probely really giving me down the road. lol He and I were different on the outside so much but on the inside we are all truely just alike. We all hurt, I just wish I could have done something to take away the pain he was feeling. And I know you do with Chris. Anyhow it's hard for me to find the right words to be of much help but I hope you know I care. I will do my best to visit Chris' site more. I wish you and your family peace in this new year and many blessing to share. I keep getting told time will heal the pain, I know it's not true. Time helps us learn how to manage and deal with the pain but it never stops hurting. I care and you know where to find me if you want to share your thoughts ok? love and strength to you, Rosemary (sis of ^j^ Alvin Cremeans)
this is so true / Angela Slow tears are the worst to fall They well up strong then slowly crawl Taking much too long to taste Washing what voice you may have away A memory lingers in each one That's why we try to hold them in So if eyes are windows to the soul My vision is blurred by a slow, steady rain
I am so sorry Angela / Rosemary Sis Of ^j^ Alvin Cremeans Angela, I am so sorry that you are hurting, and I understand some of your pain because I feel it too. I also lost my brother as I told you in my email yesterday. I am so very sorry that any of us have to go through this horrible nightmare that seems never ending. But please know that I care and if you ever need to talk, please email me. Don't try to hide the pain, don't be afraid to let it out, share your pain and suffering. Reading over your brothers site it is obvious that he was loved very much and so are you. I don't have that kind of support from family or friends outside of those I have met through the internet. It's sad that I have to share my feelings with people who never knew me untill we met here on the internet. But it's just the way it is, for reasons I will never understand. I guess they just don't know what to say or at least that's what I have been told. So sad they never heard of hallmark or american greetings cards! But I made it this far without their help, I will make it the rest of the way. It's not supose to be this way and it shouldn't be. I just pray they never have to truely know the pain I feel. Anyhow I just wanted you to know I stopped by for another visit and I think you were very blessed to have had a brother like Chris. He will always be your brother, and now your angel. Don't forget I care, Whenever you need to share your pain, I care and I will do what I can to help. Hugs to you sweetheart. Rosemary
If only / :( I have a hard time breathing today. Deep breathes hurt so bad. My heart is heavy and my soul so troubled. Your loss is more than I can take a lot of the times. I try and just go on like I have been told I have to and it just hurts so dam bad. Why you are gone or how all this happend will never make sense to me. Every thing and everyone is just so fucked up. There is no end to this grief. If you hurt as deep as you loved someone this will never heal. There is not a replacement for you in my life. There is not a replacement for you in the lives of my daughters. There is not a replacement and there never will be. How dare you!!!!!! I miss you so much even still the longer it has been the more I miss you. I know most who have pointed fingers at me are getting past and getting by it is numbing for them just as it did for us after time when we lost a friend. But for me this will never ever ever go away. I want to hate you for this and be mad at you like it will help it not hurt but for the love of God I can not. I want people to remember you and your smile and your likes and dislikes but I find it is a struggle to keep up with. I want to keep your site public because for some reason your passing has helped many people. But it is soooo hard to do this. I want to not feel like this anymore. I am tired of hiding my tears away day after day. I am tired of trying to make sure no one sees me cry. I am tired of having to remind people why I am like this now. I will never be the same again so just stop asking already. Nothing will ever be the same!
nothing but heartbreak / Rene Lewis (Angela's best friend ) it crazy the wake that is left behind with the effect of our decitions. just thinking about you and all the lives you have touched makes my heart ache. Ang and i went and saw trin last time she was in town. she is huge! not a baby anymore. i love that she holds on to you so tightly. she is open to love and support from others, but none will replace you! and she is doing great! she seems very happy. tatum is doing a great job! but just seeing her makes me ache! thinking of my own, forever wanting and knowing such loss at so young makes me just want to hold her forever and try to take her pain away. i have to make myself think of other things. well, ms angela, you know i'm here. i hope this didn't make you cry. i'll hug and hold MY trinity extra tonight
Angela..My heart goed out to you / Shirley George (Passing by ) Angel Christopher Please send hugs & kisses to your sister every day & night. She misses you so much. Send pennies from heaven too. I find pennies all the time from my son Michael. I feel his presence every time I pick up a penny. Angela As long as you keep your brothers memory alive he will live on in the hearts of those who love him. We are only a breath away from seeing Christopher again and all out loved ones. They will meet us when our time comes and show us the glory of heaven and landing on the beautiful shore. Until then we will mourn their loss, cry our tears, and say our prayers. Shirley A. George Mother of Michael F. Ryan..find a grave
I love you Bubba / Angela
Happy Easter! Always in my thoughts! / Eva Bates (Angel Mom )
HAPPY EASTER TO YOU ALL / SELMA FLYNN
I came across this memorial / Tina (guest) And I can feel your pain cut so deep! and I have to say that God must have brought me here as I have been suffering depression for a long time and I think about suicide and being here I see how it causes the ones who love you so mcuh pain! I sit here and cry...to think how much you love him!!!! and he's not there to share it! Chris is wrapped in God's arms now...He is at peace....He watches you and knows you love him...please know that! Thank you for sharing Chris with us (strangers) Thru your pain....you may save lives.....I know when things get tough I will think of your love for chris!!
I just went through your site again Chris. It is absolutely beautiful. I laughed and cried about the girl scout and the cookies. It touched my heart that you were so concerned with wanting her to win the trip to space camp. Laughter followed with the part about the 2 of you jumping around yelling that you were going to space camp. It gave me more of an insight to the type of person you are and what you have in your heart. It sounds to me like you have a heart of gold! God Bless you for that. I do believe it has trickled down through your family because your sister has a heart of gold also. You can feel her love expressed so strongly on this site. I know that this 1st anniversary of your loss is a very emotional, heart wrenching time. My heart goes out to all of you. It is so easy to see why you are loved so much Chris. I wish I could give these flowers to you myself.
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